3 a.m. insights

1. free shots are beyond most people's power to resist. but keep an eye out for when you are being used to provide free shots.
   
2. if mbas are self- aggrandizing assholes, ibankers are self-aggrandizing assholes to the third power. it's the nature of the beast.
3. most boys do not need music to dance. mostly because they dance in the same damn way regardless of beat, situation, or partner. this is sad.
4. the best card games are the ones that are made up as they go by a drunk girl you do not know.
   
5. there are people out there who still consider jerry seinfeld a fashion icon. and manage to make him look, by comparison, like a versace model.
6. having someone draw interest rate curves on your thigh is not as hot as it sounds. no, really, it isn't even as hot as it sounds.
7. when someone laughs in your actual face the second or third time you try to kiss them after they've already told you they're not going to kiss you, it's probably time to give up. this means you should actually give up.
8. parked cars hide you from neither the people in the bar nor the passing traffic; this is not a good place to decide to pee.
9. bouncers who will not let you in to the bar because you are too drunk will let you in if you try to pee in the street. (but possibly only if you are hot and your friend is wearing an exploding boob shirt)
10. three hours is plenty of time to get in plenty of trouble.